Chronicles of a Human Being

Unworthy /ˌənˈwərT͟Hē/ – adjective – not deserving effort, attention, or respect.

A word that always rang a bell in my head. I have heard it so many times, coming from other people, being said to other people, and worst of all, self-spoken to myself. However, I never used it, especially not when interacting with someone. I used to say an object wasn’t worthy of the money claimed on it, or that a troubled situation was not worthy of my attention, but even then, it just didn’t sound right. And, sadly, I used it a lot on myself, especially when I was about to move on with my own life: a new job, a house, a family. I mean, who was I to deserve all that? Of course, I was feeling unworthy!

An unimaginable thing comes out of feeling unworthy. It is something that the ones that accuse you of unworthiness actually try to avoid by telling you don’t deserve different things, and that is: fury! Not anger, not frustration, just plain, simple fury! The way I discovered this was by observing and understanding what happens to some of the children today: you tell them they haven’t done their chores, therefor they don’t deserve something, and you try to push on them a good behavior, or at least you expect submission from them by stating this. It is not the case today! The children will protest, demand respect by default and ask to be considered as individuals with their own thoughts and agendas.

It seems like all the ages of human unworthiness are backfiring at all of us in an unexpected way. All the millennia that went on with people making other people feel unworthy (how is this possible, as we are all people?) or emotionally blackmailing them, has just started to backfire. And it is, of course, a normal thing to happen! If you push too much pressure where is not needed, the entire situation will eventually burst! We have been made to believe we didn’t deserve to be born, to eat, live, breath, own material things, have a nice house, feel happiness, walk freely and smiling in the streets, etc. by other people. Not by a god, not by someone from outside our world, but by our own kind. And the purpose of this was mainly to keep people with a low self-esteem. Because, when you have a low self-esteem, you can be convinced easily not to ask for more, for respect or for a dignifying treatment.

The people that made others feel unworthy, suffered of the same low self-esteem, and by subjugating others, they were trying to reinforce their own worthiness or to keep the ones around them on the same low self esteem level, in order for them not to feel ashamed anymore. It all happened like a chain, after the first human beings realized they could use and manipulate others through making them feel small, insignificant and … guilty. They saw that the more you make someone feel bad about themselves, the easier it is to force different tasks on them. The Minimum Effort Law of the Universe says that nobody can force anyone or anything to happen, but if you push it too hard, if you really don’t give up although you see you’re struggling, it will burst and backfire onto you. That is exactly what happened with the low self esteem too. I guess we, as a humankind, never thought that making ourselves feel unworthy will transform into fury, into an unprecedented rage. Because if you convince someone they are not worthy of your time, money, and worst of all, love, they will try to put up to your high standards. But only for a while! It is not going to take long until they will see their struggle is useless, they are still considered unworthy, and they will stop trying to please. They will start fighting back, knowing that anyways, all they do is wrong, accused by the ones that are judging them, they know they don’t have a chance to ever elevate themselves to the desired level. And they will start arguing, saying No, being rude, not caring and feeling furious, believing, in the end, everything they had been told: that they are “mean” persons. They won’t try to prove others wrong anymore, they will finally accept as true what has been said about them and start acting accordingly.

The cure for this is seeing everyone as equally worthy. We are all here, on Earth, together, human beings with the same capabilities, that deserve the same respect and appreciation. Yes, it will take a while until all the fury in the human kind is cured, but this can’t wait too long anymore. Feeling unworthy drags us downwards, makes us to not take action, hide, feel shy, abandoned and useless. As long as we are here, on this planet, it means we have a birth right to be here. We are souls walking in this material fantasy that we call “reality”. We are worthy of all is good in life, of all the happiness, abundance and respect. We are infinite, being present for a short moment here, on the playground, together with others. And the infinite can’t be, by default, unworthy.

So if you ever find yourself saying to another person that they don’t deserve something, or worse, convincing yourself in the mirror you don’t deserve things, please just stop! Stop, and tell yourself you are worthy, you deserve everything that is good in this world! And then, tell it to the one in front of you too!