I was 11 years old when I discovered a book called “History of Religions”, written by Mircea Eliade, in my family’s library. I found this book, and I got fascinated by it, by the multitude of possibilities for someone to believe in something. I already knew that some people have different believes, gods named differently, but I never before saw all of them together, in a synthesis. Little did I know at that time that my 1st line was responsible with my investigative side. I got magnetized by that book, and then, I needed to know more. So, I started reading the holy books of all the religions I could find. In the same time, going through high school, I was introduced to new subjects, as Logic and Psychology. Philosophy was also there, but I never really engaged with it. The same happened with History, which at that time, seemed like an ordeal capable of freezing time. It was just dates and events and no real connection between them for my mind to grasp onto. It took me another 10 years, after graduating from high school, to get interested in and include in my mind puzzle the subject called History.

I always loved putting together data and making bigger pictures out of it. It was this skill that I used that was my first experience with Human Design. Unconsciously, I loved just gathering information for the sake of it and creating bigger pictures. I had later to discover that this was the basis of my design, my personal foundation, to become a “mountain of information”. But back then, I was just interested in everything I could read, about all the symbols, believes, superstitions, but also faith, trust and the various relationships between all these. I had the feeling that there is more, much more than what we perceive and do on a daily basis. I had the feeling that all the religions and systems of believes were here to ease the mind, give it a clear structure and explain somehow that which cannot be perceived. I was to find out, through Human Design again, that all this feeling and need for understanding was also part of my 1st line.

But information and data is nothing if not used for a higher purpose, for an action that can improve one’s life. I looked for a way to put together everything I knew and experimented and to draw an outline of what this experience called “Life” is. Therefor I started going to different workshops about the human mind, psychology and different types of systems and techniques to keep the mind and body in shape.

The ideas I could draw as a conclusion were that we all look for purpose in life, we all have hopes and concerns, we all feel lonely sometimes and we would all like to have just a bit of saving, once in a while. We try to figure out what and why is happening to us, how the world works and how we can feel better and have a more pleasant life. We all have a body that degrades if we don’t take care of it, we all need to eat, rest and live. Our stories may seem from the exact same movie although we were born in opposite places on this planet. None of us wants to harm or be harmed, and we all try to do our best to survive and have a life. I met people from different cultures, with different traditions, clothing and way of thinking, but the basis was always the same: a human being trying to find their way.

I had the fortune of encountering only the right people in these workshops and reunions, or maybe it was just me following my Authority. I had a big amount of things to learn from all the conversations and interactions I had. Until, one day, all that knowledge didn’t feel enough, and applying the known strategies didn’t lead to the same expected results. That is when my mind felt like, again, there must be more. There has to be a manual for how everything works! There must be a way to draw the pattern of the world that surrounds us, it must all be logical and understandable! If only there was a manual for… life!

And there was! But the first time I was introduced to Human Design it was about 8 years ago. My mind was not ready yet, and I was missing experience and understanding to go through with it. I found out I was a Manifesting Generator and that was about it. I tried looking it up a bit but it was just too much information, and too abstract for what I needed at that time. And that was OK. Human Design is a system for which one has to be ready, it can’t be taught by force. It is a system that takes time to be processed, it doesn’t give anyone any solutions over night. It is something that you read about, put the book down, go and experience and live, and understand what you just read. It also made me see things that I can’t un-see, brought acceptance for the world and life as is. It gave my mind the “Why’s” and “How’s”, while still leaving it on it’s own to figure out how to apply all of that.

Human Design is a system that you could say is based on I’Ching, Astrology, Physics, Mathematics and Numerology. In my opinion, a system that includes and covers it all was gold for my mind. I love synthesized information, all in one place, all together. I also find interesting that it’s founder, Ra Uru Hu (born Alan (Robert) Krakower, in Canada) never asked anyone to blindly believe anything he said, nor he asked to be followed or deified. He always asked people to try for themselves, see if they feel like it and how it works.

It all begins with knowing, as good as possible, your birth date, place and time. And from there, it’s a whole new universe! You can keep it at a simple level trying to figure out first your Authority and Strategy, listen to them and see how that goes. The next step could be in understanding the different defined centers, channels and gates. It is complex and you can search into it and complicate it as you wish, or keep it simple and easy. It takes years to decondition, which is to find out who you truly are and what is healthy and right for you, out of all the influence of the other people and the society. We are of different types, different definitions, every design and chart is unique. There are billions of combinations possible, but in the end, the gates and the basis are the same. It speaks about what we can bring into the world, skills, talents and gifts, of how we could use them properly for our own benefit and for the ones around us. It finally gives a manual to what and how could be done, what would be the mental hygiene for a person to make them feel good through this journey. I found that Human Design goes very well, hand in hand, with other deconditioning techniques like meditation, breathing exercises and even gardening! It closed the circle and brought the last pieces of the puzzle together.

We can all experiment an awesome journey on this rock called Earth, floating through space. And each of us has their own, unique path and way.

Almost 9 years ago, I realized I had to change a few things, something no longer felt right and I had no clear direction of what or how I wanted it to be. Little did I know I was having this process during my Saturn return, so definitely things were going to change. I think anyways, even culturally, when you approach the 30^th anniversary, some questions arise and you enter a different dimension.

Therefore, I started searching, looking more into it, trying to find at least a clear picture of what I wanted. I always loved searching, reading, accumulating information, plus I had a crush with Psychology and Philosophy. Even as a child, I would ask questions like “Why is the water wet?” and “What is outside the Universe?”. “Why?” was and still is my favorite question. I like going down to the root of things, to the reasons why something happens as it does, putting pieces of information together to fill in the big picture. I love the big picture, but also going into specific details, if something looks of interest.

I found out a lot about myself, from people coming from different environments, people with different backgrounds, applying a certain technique or another, teaching various systems, from self-development and business approach, to psychology, numerology, astrology, and finally Human Design.

The first time I heard about it, was during a meditation workshop, where the facilitator offered to calculate my profile. Her words still sound in my head: “Oh dear, you are a Manifesting Generator!”. “You have a lot of energy within, but you are not letting it out, to manifest” she continued. I went home and Googled a bit about the subject, but, it seemed years later, that was not the right time. The amount of information was overwhelming, texts that I found online were just repeating the same stuff. It was around 5000+ pages of reading, about some Mechanics, Physics, planets and where they were when I was born. A different type of horoscope, I joked to myself, and I just abandoned the idea.

I kept on working with myself, using the already known techniques, getting to a point where my mind thought there can’t be anything else. But my mind was so wrong! Due to different aspects of life and circumstances, I realized that all that I already knew, was no longer helping me. And this was because everything I learned was surely applicable to my old version, but the new version was immune to all I knew. The emergency signal was triggered by the body, as it usually happens, and I realized it was no longer cooperating as I knew until then. I went down a spiral, as all my foundational knowledge was useless now, and my health was not getting any better. Looking for information, I came across again, with the idea that I was a Manifesting Generator, so my body had a specific way of functioning due to that. Ok, now I had a reason for sure to investigate more in detail the Human Design subject. This time I looked for books, bought a few ones, and had my chart read by someone that had experience with it. It was a lot to process, and the idea behind it, that it takes up to 7 years to understand your chart and who you are, did not look appealing for someone with my short patience. But I said, hey, let’s give it a try! I haven’t tried it before, I don’t know if it works, but something about the things it mentioned resonated with me. I had applied other things before, and they had all worked, so I thought at least I could learn something new and expand my “database”, if nothing else.

This is how I got to really try out Human Design. I found out I am an Emotional Manifesting Generator, 5/1 profile, with a Left Angle Cross of Duality. I read, study, think about a subject, and in the end I have to see how the subject feels to me. And yes, that takes time, now I understand those 7 years needed for a complete rewiring. There is so much I can understand about myself and the world around through it. Things that I could not see where they were coming from before, now seem obvious. It is like a whole manual on what and how things should be done in order for us to thrive. Everyone is unique, with their own qualities and designs, everyone has the potential to develop into someone amazing and uplifting for themselves and the ones around. We all have 64 possible gates, defined or undefined, making up to 192 crosses, on 9 centers and numerous possibilities of combinations between different gates. All of us have the same template, empty blueprint, as in we all have similar characteristics and traits, but the fine differences make each of us unique.